Yet another issue that confronted me at Tempo was the concept of emotional availability. One of the sessions I attended was two new teachers talking about the challenges of doing all the things you haven't been taught. One challenge they described was dealing with being emotionally available for your students.
Because we teach something that is by nature a social and group activity, students can find it easier to connect with us. We have a responsibility to be open to students when they need to talk, and you are the only one they feel comfortable talking to. This is one aspect of emotional availability.
Another is that we need to be comfortable with our students seeing us as real people. That means that we do have bad days, and we also have exciting events in our lives. It's okay for your students to know that you have strep throat and can't talk loudly, or that your sister is getting married this weekend and you can't wait to stand with her at the front of the church. Knowing these things about you won't hurt your professional relationship, and it can even strengthen the teacher-student bond.
The other aspect of emotional availability is knowing how far to go. It can be hard to build and keep proper boundaries between you and your students. But they have to understand that although you are there for them, it isn't appropriate for them to text you every detail of their lives, or send you pictures of their party on the weekend, or come to your office ten times a day. And you have to understand that you can't own their problems. Be there for them, help them in every way you can, but you can't allow a student problem to overcome you. It isn't fair to the other students that depend on you if you are unable to teach your best.
This is one part of teaching that I think I will find difficult. I tend to want to fix everyone's problems, but that isn't always possible. I have to learn when to get involved, and when to let someone better qualified handle the situation. Being aware of this challenge will at least let me go in with my eyes open.
Very thoughtful post - it is important to let students know you are a real person and taking an interest in their life does make for a good relationship - and that helps learning. As you say, there has to be a line as well.
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